Get your kid’s tommy john surgery today
Now that she’s in pre-school, now that she’s pre-k
By first grade she’ll be ready to play
Get your kid’s tommy john surgery today

Get your kid’s tommy john surgery
In t-ball she’ll be all she can be
Tiny little tendons are pliable wow
Get your kid’s tommy john surgery now

Kazoo

I want my tommy john surgery now
Please dad won’t you kindly allow
A little snip snip dad, don’t be a fool
Wait til I tell all the kids at school

Get your kid’s tommy john surgery whee
Before they know their abc’s
Jump-start the process do it for your kid
You will not be sorry you did

Get your kid’s tommy john surgery today

(lyrics: Dan Bern)