Opposable Thumb

Over the last seven months my little dog, Gidget
Has developed an opposable thumb
She now pumps the gas when we go to the Exxon
And I’m slowly teaching her how to drive
When people see her typing
They figure it’s like one of those dogs who wears funny hats
Or things equally dumb
But it’s not like that at all
It’s my little dog, Gidget
And her brand new opposable thumb

I’ve begun making her travel
By herself on the bus
To towns three and four hours away
She writes me postcards
Her penmanship is fair
I’m having quite a time is all she’ll say
It’s hard letting go
But I’m awfully proud of her
With her knife and fork she doesn’t miss a crumb
Life is much improved
Since my little dog, Gidget
Developed an opposable thumb

Perhaps one day
She’ll wander off and get a job
Doing data entry or light filing in an office
When that day comes I’ll be sad
But I won’t be one of those guys getting in the way of his dog’s progress

Last week at Dodger Stadium
She threw out the first
Ceremonial pitch before they played the Braves
Yesterday she painted me a nice little canvas
Of a sailboat bobbing gently on the waves
If you’re proud of your dog
Because she chases sticks
Well, Gidget grabs those sticks and plays a drum
Life is really good
Since my little dog, Gidget
Developed an opposable thumb


O—posable thumb

(lyrics: Dan Bern)

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