Dan Bern | Hobo

I am a lonesome hobo without family or friends
I was married to Madonna but you know how those things end
I built the LA freeway and the Astrodome too
And I captured all the rats in the San Diego Zoo

Hobo, hobo,
I ride the rails,
I am a lonesome hobo

I was born as a woman but I grew to be a man
With a wiener like a hammer and balls like frying pans
And palms so hairy they could smother Herbert Hoover
And a thousand dirty books in my literary oeuvre

Hobo, hobo,
I ride the rails,
I am a lonesome hobo

Because he wore a dress I thought my uncle was my aunt
Had a yeast infection and invented the croissant
Wilt Chamberlain’s my father but he never did acknowledge
That I broke all his records at the local barber college

Hobo, hobo, etc.

You can find me in a boxcar, sleeping off a drunk
In my purse is a possum, in my pocket is a skunk
I smell so bad, if you smell me you would die
We could freeze you and cook you on the Fourth of July

Hobo, hobo,
I ride the rails,
I am a lonesome hobo

I am a lonesome hobo without friends or family
I was hatched to a bunch of birdies living in a tree
I ate worms till I was twelve, then for New York I set sail
And ever since you’ll find me out there riding the rails

Hobo, hobo,
I ride the rails,
I am a lonesome hobo

(lyrics: Dan Bern)