DEAR TIGER WOODS

DEAR TIGER WOODS
DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN YOU FIRST CAME ALONG
AND HOW YOUR DAD SAID YOU WOULD CHANGE THE WORLD
AND HOW YOUD BE A LEADER LIKE MAYBE LIKE GANDHI

HEY TW
I WAS THINKIN HOW MAYBE YOU ACTUALLY COULD
ACTUALLY COULD BE LIKE GANDHI
LIKE PEOPLE ARE OVER WHATEVER YOU DID
I MEAN IT WASN’T EVEN A BAD AS WITH KOBE
NOW LOOK HOW EVERYBODY LOVES KOBE
ANYWAY YOURE LOTS MORE FAMOUS THAN KOBE
AND YOU PROVED YOU CAN COME BACK AND BE COMPETITIVE
YOU EVEN WON ANOTHER MAJOR IT WAS AWESOME
YOU’RE AT LEAST AS GOOD AS JORDAN WITH THE WIZARDS….

BUT HEY TW
SO I WAS THINKIN, LIKE, MAYBE WITH THE GOLF
MAYBE IT’S TIME TO PLAY A LITTLE LESS GOLF
IT’S NOT LIKE I THINK YOU SHOULD BE PRESIDENT
I MEAN, NOW WHO REALLY WANTS TO BE PRESIDENT
I WAS THINKIN MORE ALONG THE LINES OF EMPEROR
LET’S SAY TEMPORARY KING OF THE WORLD

BUT WE DON’T NEED TO GET AHEAD OF OURSELVES
LET’S GO BACK TO GANDHI
THIS COULD BE YOUR UNEXPECTED TURN
YOUR AGASSI-LIKE MOVE TO HOLINESS
YOU SHOULD ASSEMBLE A GANDHI TEAM
MAKE STATEMENTS LIKE
“LET’S TAKE THE NEXT 2 GENERATIONS TO MOBILIZE EVERY PERSON ON EARTH IN THE IMMEDIATE SHIFT TO A SUSTATINABLE AND HUMANE PLANET.”

SO YEAH, TIGER WOODS
REMEMBER WHAT YOUR DADDY GROOMED YOU FOR
AND WHEN YOU DO ASSEMBLE THAT TEAM
I GOT A LOTTA FRIENDS WHO’LL WANNA BE ON IT
AND CERTAINLY YOU’RE GONNA NEED SONGWRITERS….

HEY TW
DEAR TW
HEY TW

(lyrics: Dan Bern)