I’ll tell you a tale if you promise not to laugh
Lincoln’s on the penny, Kennedy is on the half
Kennedy faces left, like he’s looking for a fight
And for whatever reason, Lincoln faces right

It’s a weird little thing
It’s a weird little thing
It’s a weird little thing
I remember reading a long time ago
When I was a kid

Lincoln’s secretary’s name was Kennedy, and I’m thinkin’
Kennedy’s secretary’s name was Mrs. Lincoln
Mrs. Lincoln told her boss don’t go to Dallas that day
Mrs. Kennedy told Lincoln not to see the play

chorus

Oswald shot from a warehouse and he hid in a theater
Booth shot Lincoln in a theater and he hid in a warehouse
Both their vice presidents had the same name
And the number of letters in their names were the same

chorus

Lincoln was elected in 1860
Kennedy was elected in 1960
Whoever gets elected in 2060
Had better beware, had better think about this

Weird little thing
Weird little thing
This weird little thing
I remember reading
A long time ago, when I was just a kid

(lyrics: Dan Bern)